Sailor Moon Comic Ideas

here`s a story i sorta wanted to write for VIP2 but i never found the time to do it (and i suck at writing)

when the scouts go to the future during the black moon clan saga and sailor moon is captured by demand, as he attempts to sway her to his side, he gives her to oppurtunity to look around his "palace" (i dont remember where their base of operations was in the future) and decide what she wants to do. Emeraud concocts a plan that by taking a shard of dark crystal, grinding it up and mixing it with her smoke. When serena comes by Emeraude`s room, she breathes in the smoke slowly warming her to the idea of taking the easy route and joining the black moon clan. Emeraude convinces her of all the "pleasures" of the dark crystal and the "ecstacy" it brings.

By the end of the conversation sailormoon is no more and she decides to willing join the black moon. They bring her to the dark crystal where she presents to empyrean silver crystal and it is corrupted by the dark crystal and she re-dubs it the nightmare crystal of dominance and it bonds with her similar to when she becomes princess serenity but she comes out the dark form, Queen Kristel (like all names sounds like a crystal, but isnt quite it) is now born. She is more mature looking (i dont just mean bigger tna, personally not a fan of the whole way oversized), has the dark upside down crescent moon, the black crystal earrings, a slim form fitting black dress with the crystal on some kind of brooch over her breast, and a black tiara. She floats in the air and glides around, so powerful that she does not bother to even walk.

She turns to the rest of the black moon clan and declares herself the queen and her reign will begin again in the 20th century and they establish Nemesis Tokyo. She created a palace similar to the one in the anime, and the scouts come to stop her. She laughs and says that their power was born of the silver crystal and can be altered by it (dunno if that`s cannon or not, just making it up) and she converts them over. They also become more mature with the upside down black moon and the earrings, but they wear black leather suits stripped down the side with their colour. They also change their names according to a stone with the same color (i can`t think of any names atm)

and thats basically the story i came up feel free to use elements from it or add, subtract, change names etc.

sounds fun, very fun actually

there's gotta be some people willing to help you with that

how about something like this

after an encounter with a monster the scouts all get a face full of some harmless substance that isn't so harmless at all. later on as they sleep they're getting dreams of submitting to a big villainess of your choice and wake up frightened not understanding where these dreams come from or why they have them, at first its very innocent but as time goes and they fight more monsters who they start to understand more and more the dreams get more intense and eventually they can't take it any more and that's when they encounter the original monster they thought they had destroyed again.

the monster reveals they only destroyed a fake and that everything has gone according to the mistress's plans and they have only one chance of saving themselves from a life of servitude to the villainess and that is to defeat her because only her destruction will release the substance to counter the original one and give them back their normal dreams.

the scouts want to serve so desperately but want to get rid of the desire as well, they leave unsure of what to do but the dreams keep coming and soon the first scout comes to the monster trying to fight to return back to normal not wanting to sacrifice her friends should she lose, which she does, this continues until all scouts have been defeated and they all end up in a cocoon with their heads visible through a window as their body undergoes the changes their mistress wants them to have as well as the last steps of the conditioning and rewriting of their memory's

and they all lived happily ever after serving their mistress

Alright, here's something that came to mind-

Villains: The Oppositio Senshi
Dress-up: The Sailors don tight black bodysuits (just normal bodysuits at the start)
Absorption idea: Being pulled into a mirror. Once that's done, the bodysuits on the Sailors start to take on traits of the Oppositio Senshi suits.
Awkward, optional twist: By submitting to the Oppositio Senshi, the Sailors become the Oppositio Senshi, and the Oppositio become the True Sailor Senshi, reflected in their costumes. Pretty much a costume switch, but with the originals in dark submission to their opposites.

Why would this happen? I don't know, but feel free to add on to this idea if you want.

yeah the idea of them "offering" themselves to some one like esmeraude does have a high appeal.

i would suggest contacting either rosvo, jin or Sigfried028 who is a real genious, there's also bokuman but i don't think he does comics and maybe if she responds emanon.

Mind if I put some ideas out there?

Considering the initial dress-up idea, I actually think it would be appropriate to involve the Ayakashi Sisters. Berthier in particular is naturally charming and inviting.

How about an alternate take of episode 61, where Berthier takes over Otafukuya Cosmetics. The makeup itself could be mixed together the ground-up powder from the shards of the dark crystal.

Berthier in her civilian guise could approach and invite the girls to her shop while Usagi is gushing about her boyfriend Mamoru, annoying Rei. Berthier would be friendly, stating they should come to her cosmetics store as she can transform them into beautiful princesses so they can all find their princes. Later Rei would find herself approaching the newly opened store in spite of herself. Berthier would greet her and move past Rei's hesitation by offering a free makeover as her first customer. As Rei is made up, Berthier uses her natural charm, as well as her hypnotic magic and the influence of the dark crystal to get Rei to open up about her jealousy of Usagi's relationship. While Rei isn't proud of these thoughts, Berthier states it's alright to feel what she feels. However, Berthier thinks to herself that Rei's jealousy can be nourished into a beautiful darkness that will envelop her heart and make her a willing slave to her clan. Rei's new appearance is beautiful and mature. She's gives a scathing remark towards Usagi along the lines of: Usagi is sooo lucky to have been born the Moon Princess and have her power and boyfriend by default. This upsets Usagi, who states Rei's become more narcissistic since she changed her look. Suspicious, she goes to the cosmetic's store herself, but lets her guard down due to Berthier's friendly and cheerful demeanor. Usagi gets a free treatment as a friend of Rei.

Alternatively, if you want to use the "break-up" sub-plot from the anime, you could have Usagi go there instead as a means of cheering herself up.

Either way, Usagi gets the treatment herself and then seems more confident and assertive, though a little more vain. The other girls are convinced to get their beauty treatments and afterwards continue to visit to maintain their look. They start noticing changes in themselves. They start having dreams about the droids they fight, and find themselves unwilling to destroy creatures of such beauty. They talk more and more about themselves to Berthier during their treatments, worried they're losing sight of something important and only placing value in beautiful things. Bertheir tells them there's nothing wrong with favoring beautiful things and states her duty to guide people towards the truth. She drops her guise and reveals herself as one of the Black Moon sisters. The Scouts are shocked and transform, but can't bring themselves to fight her.

Berthier summons her droids to capture the scouts, and is pleasantly surprised as the girls have to talk themselves into defending themselves, stating they have to prevent the Black Moon from taking over the Earth. Berthier asks if that would be such a bad thing. She states that she knows the scouts now, and recites twisted variations of their dreams and how the Black Moon Clan would fulfill them. Rei, while being quietly jealous of Sailor Moon, really wants to take Sailor Moon's place. Ami, who wants to be a doctor so she can ease people's suffering, can instead remove suffering from the world by aiding in spreading blissful servitude to the Black Moon. Venus want's to be a goddess of love, and that's what she will become as a member of the Black Moon Clan. Likewise Makoto will become a truly feminine creature as Berthier's slave. Finally, Usagi, for all her heroism, has always been spoiled and wanted to remain a child and taken care of, and now she can be Berthier's pet forever and ever. This warping of ideals and desires fits well with the idea that the girls are not just being brainwashed, but corrupted. The Scouts escape, but eventually return on their own, eager for Berthier to complete their brainwashing.

Ahh... That's way to long to commission as a comic. Maybe I'll write it as a story instead. If you're interested, take whatever ideas you want from this.

Well, you could take ideas from what I've posted it if you want.

I'd like to write this story. I have a good outline. Unfortunately, finals are coming up and I will likely be busy for a couple weeks with school and my job. I'll definitely work on this when I need a break, but I can't give a date for completion. Maybe later this month...

By the way. The comic I commissioned myself was from enjelia at dA. Her doujinshi has a professional appearance, but she isn't open for comic commissions right now.

Sorry for getting to this late, but I had one or two epiphanies regarding this.

1) We haven't really used the DD Girls much have we, they could be perfect for this. We could make it bodicon themed, and give the DD Girls human appearances and sexy outfits if need be. Scouts go undercover to a bodicon club because they've heard the usual rumor, get dazed by the light show and seduced by the girls individually(being pulled up on stage to join the dance, invited to a private table and smoked into submission, put into cages to be fondled as they dance, take advantage of in a bathroom stall, put into one of those glass booths to explore themselves in front of others). Leading up to Moon seeing all this and giving up to the blonde one who runs it. Possible additional end, all of them are transformed into into DD like youma(in bodicon outfits of course).

2) Since we're talking about dreams and mirrors, why not use Queen Nehellenia? We'll probably need to alter her outfit to make it more sexy, maybe a transparent nightgown, lingerie, maybe a babydoll to invoke more innocent kind of dreamy sense( http://danbooru.donmai.us/wiki/show?title=tag_group%3Asexual_attire ), or a more dominatrix outfit, or even a sexy ringmasters outfit. Anyway, there are several ways to approach this, the Amazon Quartet luring them into a sexy dreamland, where each does some sexy twist on their dream(example, PalaPala playing doctor with patient Ami), of course they'll probably be a little bit reluctant, which opens the door for seduction or hypnosis... Or~ we could do something with that would kind of continue off of the mirror hypnosis scene from the series, except instead of using Zicronia, we use Mirror Parody( http://www.moonlightsoldiers.com/jap/characters/monsters/lemures/mirror-paredri.html ) versions of the girls(think all nude, blue, and having Nehellenia's eye ornament. They're pulled into the mirror by them, binding them to the boards that the Amazon Trio used, but instead of having their mirrors taken away from them Nehellenia appears and merely instructs them to watch as their parody selfs worship her, but letting them know that if they watch they might just become enthralled by the site("glamour" and hypnotic background). The girls close their eyes, but then they start to hear what sounds like their moans, one looks, and slowly falls for the site, another checks up on her and falls under the spell, another tried to wake them up from it, but falls as well trying to do so, another one just gives in, and the last one is just tempted into surrender. They begin to believe that they are their Mirror Parodies and climax when their Queen commands their doppelgangers to with a snap. This also causes them to wake up on their beds, unsure if it was a dream or real(which is where both ideas can meet). They eventually all meet up at the circus, embarrassed, but they can't go on without knowing. They are lead into the circus by giggling sexy lemures, who grope them, but the girls don't resist... Eventually they get to Nehellenia, who merely snaps her fingers and causes them to fall to their knees. They then realize what they really came here to do, and offer their dream mirrors to her, pleading for submission, which she accepts. This either ends up with them truly becoming the mirror parodies, or sexy brainwashed circus girls(possibly dressed in amazon attire or something else). But yeah, there is a lot of wiggle room with this one.

I hope either of those fits the mold you were looking for, or at least you got a kick out of it. Also Soupy, your idea sound very awesome, and a detailed story of such would be a must read for me, Berthier was always my favorite sister =)

I'm actually quite amazed my random thought is being taken so easily by you guys i should try this more often

Kamenrider wrote:I'm actually quite amazed my random thought is being taken so easily by you guys i should try this more often

This is why I always encourage more people to be active. More people=more ideas and viewpoints =)

yeah but usually i feel my ideas are just repeats with some personal touch to it

intro i'd say b or d or even combine them

then either 2 or 3

Hehehe, so Esmeraude again I see. Heh, don't blame you though, your money and it's always nice to see a new artist's take on your favorite character.

Hmm, I'm going to go off on a bit of a tangent here for a second.

What about having one of the more stronger scouts(like Jupiter or Mars, maybe even Venus since she is second in command) try to confront her Esmeraude alone. Esmeraude then convinces them(via smoke, stroking, posing) they came by themselves, knowing how hopeless it was, to just get it over with and lose to her, which will be the truth, though the scout will still try to fight it. However, in the end they ultimately give in to Esmeraude's temptation as she begins to plant kisses over their bare flesh, their Sailor transformation breaks, and then they are at her mercy and know it. From here, Esmeraude can trap them in one of the emeralds on her dress and say they'll have front row seats to the defeat of their friends by being a damsel in distress that will lead the others to their doom, just like she wanted to be, ooor, nylon cocoon them and transform them into one of her loyal droids to help restrict the scouts in someway when they arrive(maybe something that has a bunch of tentacle like feminine gloved hands, or uses her hair to trap them, or so many other things), or performs a dance with Esmeraude that will help hypnotize them, oooor she herself has some type of hypnotic mind like power, where her thoughts of loving and worshiping Esmeraude enter the scouts heads and they eventually succumb to them.

That's just my take on the beginning, what you have for the ending sounds really hot.

both sound epic but personally i feel if esmeraude is gonna have them why not put them to good use for her own ends instead of just locking them up in emeralds forever. they could be a group of droids or more like the ayakashi sisters and be called the emerald senshi or something and perhaps be esmeraude's royal guard.

the gloves could indeed be part of the process of making them suggestible.

then they are convinced to willingly step in to what will finish corrupting and changing them and in there you see like a sort of vapour leave the scouts mouths being their free will and be replaced by what esmeraude wants. and somehow i do prefer nylon for them to be encased with maybe with a greenish hue

3 with these elments of number one added

the nylon cocoons replace the clams
and while in the other world esmeraude first seduces them before cocooning them so they willingly step in to their respective nylon cocoons

I like Kamenrider's idea.

and i'll leave what happens after up to you rico

Hmm, well I'm still a fan of using the Esmeraude statues as some form of trap, and I also know you want some willing submission too... what can we work out from the ideas provided.

Let's see... How about the scouts are about to defeat her, but with a flick of her fan her full size black statues(aka Dark Henge) comes to life and restrain the scouts, putting them right where she wants them. Alternatly, Esmeraude lures them into her chamber and easily traps them with her statues, always clearly being the victor. Personally I always like the "never had a chance route", it gives the villainess more credence to be worshiped, though then again, I love it more when the heroines' own over confidence or slip ups lead to their defeat. Maybe we could combine the two, have some of the stronger or more fool hardy scouts push to go deeper in her layer with the weaker more submissive ones raise worries, but are ultimately dragged along. Now, how the Dark Henge restrict the scouts, they could either sprout tentacle gloves or come to life and grab them.

From here... hmm, the scouts could be absorbed into the Dark Henge into dream world, OR they could merely restrain the scouts as Esmeraude hypnotizes them(the whole background shifts into swirling green/purple/pink and black, commands the scouts to focus on her as she strikes sexy poses/dances/flirts/blows smoke). Either option works, though if we do go with the absorption route at the end the Dark Henge can then transform into the madeover/corrupted/Droided scouts(though I'm pretty sure you're going for the madeover theme here), so that would be something to keep in mind.

Now, as for the seduction order and the how, I think that should be important too so it's not vanilla, every scout has their own flavor. This is just my personal stab at it though, but first would be Venus, caught up by Esmeraude's beauty and allure. Next would be Mercury, bashfully loving how she completely converted and now controls Venus. Next up would be Jupiter, who tries to throw on a brave face but can't help but tremble as she gets seduced by Esmeraude feminine wiles, Moon begs to be next but gets passed over to Mars, who is defiant, but obviously shaken. However Esmeraude points out how aroused she truly is by caressing her, eventually making Mars cry out and beg for it before she is rewarded. Finally all that left is Moon, and Esmeraude snaps her fingers to put her brainwashed scouts into action, licking and kissing Moon all up and down her body until finally giving the princess her reward.

Alternatively, Esmeraude could instead have the scouts worship her while Moon watches as a if to rub it in more. She could then turn Moon into a Dark Henge that would forever watch them make love, dark yes, but you could have a follow up panel of Moon's face in ecstasy. As for the thing that brainwashes them, makes them over, a deep kiss should do, the effects, Black Moon crescent on forehead, earrings, and either nudity or madeover outfits.

Dark Henge


If all of the above fails to entice you, then 2 =)

you got some good mojo cooking man

but here's another ending to it after a nice while in the dark henge moon comes out as either a droid or is brainwashed so much that she believes Esmeraude is in fact her mother and or lover

btw you can combine over confidence with never stood a chance.
how about they almost defeat her outside the blackmoon's base and then she flee's inside with maybe a girl that escaped the process of being made a droid and they go in and split up find nothing and then meet again and take the last path with the more meek ones thinking its a bad idea but the stronger ones wining out in the end.

i like idea that the hypntic part happens in an sub space but still feel it should leave them with just enough to when they are thrown out to be open to suggestions but still capable of deciding themselves what they want. esmeraude keeps flooding them with sugary sweet words of bliss etc and then one by one as per your order they give in and then go either in the statue's that now turn in to cocoons or something

but in the end moon has to first see her friends worship esmeraude for a while before her cocoon fully forms and esmeraude makes a statement that she shouldn't be sad because she'll be given the same or greater honor as with the option i mentioned above

but dude we making things harder again for rico

just wanna point out i actually used some of the ideas used here in the story i wrote which lurker is now kindly checking over and once he's done i'll post it in vip 2 and then you can all look forward to emanon posting the art for it.

lol i still get all excited and tingly in my stomach talking about it

Heheh, yeah, and I couldn't help myself and have done some additional "tuning" throughout it so I want to see it through... which of course I should of asked to do beforehand, but I haven't done anything radical, just adding in some words here, changing wording there, changing some run on sentences(much like this one, but it's not for a story so I don't give a damn right now), and adding some descriptive sentences here and there. Of course it will be up to Kamenrider to determine if I've overstepped my bounds on this one(and I really should of asked beforehand, but I just got really wrapped up in it and edited how I do my stories), so there still may be a editors slot available >_>

dude i really ain't gonna put you guys through any more waiting then needed i already mentioned this before but i planned to break the wall down something more powerful then a hydrogen bomb and open up new ways for writing with sailor moon and from hearing the enthusiasm of lurker i'd say i succeeded in that

and lurker I can't wait to see "the make up" you put on the story

yeah just had to make that bad joke

i'm gonna think about it as soon as i see lurker's edits

cool i can't wait not just to see how it will turn out
but as far as the story goes i gotta wait till lurker hands it back to me
and rico i'd love to send it to you but i'd preffer something with correct punctuation and the like
though knowing myself i'll probably read over lurkers touch ups to see how much better he made it and then decide which one to post or maybe post both just so you all get the enjoyment of both versions

Okay, I'm doing some editing and I'm gonna point out some things that can be improved on. Dialog, I feel you skip the opportunity to write it a few times as I get further in the fic, and rather just sum it up in a sentence like "She complemented her loyal minions" which I personally feel misses some potential. Example "You did a lovely job with this plain girl my loyal and loving minions. Now to apply the finishing touches, hmhmhmhm". I will say it does take up some time and space, but the end result is very rewarding.

Another thing, sexy details here and there helped, like how did the villlainess say that, did she purr it sexily into her ear? Did her minions giggle at the embarrassed girl as each seemed to take a turn caressing her? Does the main villainess's heels clicking against the floor send shudders of pleasure to all around? This one isn't really necessary but can really help flesh a story out and give it even more life.

I'm not sure of the exact rule of this, but this story really felt like it needed to be written in past tense, at least to me. The present made it felt a little clunky. I've been changing it as I go along.

Other than that the errors where very slight, need to take a break at the moment, but got a 2 more pages done(though with the text I've put in it's 2 pages longer). Also, seriously, loving this story man. Sorry it's taking me so long, but this is why I've taken a break from story writing, takes me forever~ Too easily distracted sometimes(high functioning autism, both a blessing and a curse).